Tag: funny jokes

The Hollywood Sequel Doctor Tackles “Gremlins 2” – Key & Peele

The Hollywood Sequel Doctor Tackles “Gremlins 2” – Key & Peele

By Bryan Wright 100 Comments January 3, 2020

Okay, guys, Gremlins 2. I’m telling you, this movie… [door opens and closes] – Should write itself. The first one was a classic. This should be pretty straightforward. Basically, all we’re doing is maintaining the integrity of the original picture. We want to do all the stuff with the water and the– What– Uh, can […]

Inside Amy Schumer – Boner Doctor

Inside Amy Schumer – Boner Doctor

By Bryan Wright 100 Comments November 21, 2019

if you’re healthy enough for sexual activity. If you have an erection lasting longer than four hours, call me! Hi, I’m Amy Schumer, and you can buy lab coats on eBay. An erection that won’t go away is considered a medical emergency, but in my book, it’s more of a medical opportunity. Here in my […]

The Real Reason You Have to Wait So Long at the Doctor’s Office

The Real Reason You Have to Wait So Long at the Doctor’s Office

By Bryan Wright 70 Comments November 16, 2019

(phone ringing) – [Doctor] People always ask me, “When I go to the doctor, why do I have to wait so long?” (chuckles) “What are you doctors doing back there?” (clock ticking) Well – we’re cramming. (upbeat music) – I’ve been waiting for 50 minutes. Fifty. Five. Zero. I don’t understand, I had an appointment. […]

Yo’ Mama Has Health Problems – Key & Peele

Yo’ Mama Has Health Problems – Key & Peele

By Bryan Wright 100 Comments November 12, 2019

THANK YOU FOR COMING IN WITH YOUR ASSOCIATES. I KNOW THIS IS HARD TO HEAR, BUT… WE NEED TO MAKE SOME SERIOUS DECISIONS ABOUT YOUR MOTHER’S HEALTH. LET’S BE HONEST. SHE IS GETTING ON IN YEARS. – OH, SNAP. OKAY, I SEE HOW IT IS. I SEE HOW IT I– WELL, YO MAMA SO OLD, […]

Health Care in America: Should We Just Let Poor People Die?: The Daily Show

Health Care in America: Should We Just Let Poor People Die?: The Daily Show

By Bryan Wright 100 Comments September 22, 2019

Let’s move on to our main story. The big discussion in the U.S. is, should we let poor people die or not? Or as Americans call it, health care. Because Donald Trump was elected to enact his health care plan. The way to make health insurance available to everyone is to lower the cost of […]

How the Republican Health Care Bill Came and Went: The Daily Show

How the Republican Health Care Bill Came and Went: The Daily Show

By Bryan Wright 100 Comments August 29, 2019

Welcome toThe Daily Show.Thank you so much for tuning in. I’m Trevor Noah. Thank you, everybody. Our guest tonight, legendary rapper and producer of the Starz hit showPower,50 Cent is here, everybody. -(cheering, applause) -♪ G-G-G-G-G-G ♪ ♪ G-Unit! ♪ And I am so glad we could get 50 tonight. Because last night Senate Republicans […]

What’s in the GOP’s Mysterious Health Care Bill?: The Daily Show

What’s in the GOP’s Mysterious Health Care Bill?: The Daily Show

By Bryan Wright 100 Comments August 27, 2019

Recently, everyone has been so absorbed with the whole Trump-Russia story that many people have forgotten there are things happening in Congress, namely healthcare. For seven years, for seven years now, Republicans have had one major legislative priority, and that’s been building a 60-foot-tall, coal-powered mechanical Jesus to defend America. I’m just kidding. It’s 70 […]

The GOP Still Hasn’t Figured Out Health Care: The Daily Show

The GOP Still Hasn’t Figured Out Health Care: The Daily Show

By Bryan Wright 100 Comments August 14, 2019

But let’s move on, ladies and gentlemen, to the one thing Paul Ryan spends more time on than his biceps– Obamacare. Since its very inception, Paul Ryan has had one goal. We really have a problem with the direction of these bills, and we have offered principled, alternative bills. We’re going to do everything we […]

Staying Healthy Is Actually Killing Us – The Jim Jefferies Show

Staying Healthy Is Actually Killing Us – The Jim Jefferies Show

By Bryan Wright 100 Comments August 10, 2019

>>These guys dying healthy it seems harder than ever.>>For even the most basic health advice seems impossible. Which brings us to tonight’s big question what do you people want from me.>> From May.>>First we need to get enough exercise. In general adults should get about five hours a week of moderate exercise or two and […]

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